its amazing how much i can fool myself and let my feelings become some sort of dictator of what i think i want. it is such a study in my fucked up past thinking. when i met the last oy i trully knew he wasnt the one..but i was going to pass some time with him..but once he became a little detached i was hooked on the behaviour and the feelings that were created for me..nothing to do with him as a person. it became obivous once i was out of it and realized how happy i am and how many hot cute guys there are that pay so much attention to me and are HEALTHY emotionally and dont have weird odepios like relations with much older crazy women.